It's July!

Well I am into my 33rd week of pregnancy and getting a bit antsy...Erik is even more antsy, he can't contain himself. Although we are antsy, there still seems to be things to get done before the girls arrive. I keep thinking of small things I need to shop for and have on hand. I told Erik today that I am feeling a bit inadequate as a new mom. I may have been pregnant and given birth before, but the part where you bring home the baby is all new to me. I have a lot to learn and I know it will come, but I am getting a bit nervous about the learning process. New mom anxiety I guess. I have joined a new mom's small group at church and hopefully I can learn from other mommies and get lots of good advice.

I want to thank everyone for your prayers for sleep...keep em coming. I have had some restful nights. I did talk to my doctor and he gave me some medicine to help me sleep as well. Thank the Lord!

I need to say a huge THANK YOU to all you faithful blog readers. I so appreciate your words of encouragement, both as comments on the blog and on Erik's faceboook page. I also love getting your cards in the mail, and I even received a cute comic strip the other day...Snoopy talking about sleep. So fun! There are so many of you out there reading...some of you I don't know and may never meet. I can only pray that the Lord is using this blog to draw all of you closer to Him as I share my journey. Some of you have asked if I plan to blog after the girls arrive and the answer is yes! I plan to share and document my journey for you to read and for my girls to read someday. I know it will be tough to get to the computer those first months, but even if it's not me typing...I will post something. I have an amazing sister who will post updates and keep the blog going while I am in twin mode.

My emotions have been better this week and I feel a lightness in my heart. I surrendered so much to the Lord and I finally feel like I let things go and realized I cannot control anything. I will continue to have my struggles each day, but I do feel more at peace. I am really enjoying my new devotional and the other day the following words really spoke to me.

Whenever you start to feel anxious, remind yourself that your security rests in Me alone, and I am totally trustworthy. You will never be in control of your life circumstances, but you can relax and trust in My control. I am always doing something new within My beloved ones. Be on the lookout for all that I have prepared for you.
I continue to remind myself of all the Lord has done in the past and believe in all that He can do in my future. He is trustworthy and he has a plan. Each day that we get closer to seeing our babies, is another day the Lord has created for us. When Erik and I were struggling with infertility and going through treatments the Lord reminded me that my ultimate goal in life is not being a mother, but growing closer to Him and doing His will. Although now I know His will includes being a mother, He wants so much more of me. My relationship with Him is the key to all of life. I really needed that reminder when I was deep into wanting my own desires to be fulfilled. I want to be watching, on the lookout, for all He has prepared for me. The following scripture is one I have memorized and refer to each time I allow fear to take over my mind.

When I am afraid, I will trust in you.
In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid.
Psalm 56:3-4

Much love to you all.
Jamie