20 June 2011

31 Weeks!

I just finished a morning at the pool. I left my swim suit cover up on...didn't think you'd want to see me in my swim suit. I got my big floppy hat to protect my face from sun and I am so very pale. I'm use to being pasty white...I never tan, just burn. The pool is such therapy for me, I love it! I've been having more and more braxton hicks contractions and the pool is the best remedy for that. I can walk around and don't have to worry about having those contractions.

Well I am 31 weeks and my uterus is now full grown to 40 weeks in size. So for the next 5-6 weeks the only direction for my belly to grow is out! My non-stress tests are going well. The girls are doing great each time. The nurses often comment that they are overachievers and doing great. I love when people compliment my children! For those of you who don't know what the non-stress test is, let me explain a bit. I am laying down with two monitors on my belly, one on each of the girls hearts. On a screen you can see the heart rates as numbers going up and down, as well as lines going up and down. The nurse is there to make sure the heart rates are going up and down and not dipping too low for too long. They are also looking for 2 movements from the babies in 20 minutes. They do these tests twice a week and the goal is to see whether it's best for babies to stay inside longer or if they are needing to come into the world. So far the best place for my girls is inside my womb....praying for that for at least 5 more weeks.

So I continue to have battles with my mind...the fears are creeping in. God continues to remind me of His presence and yet I allow my mind to hold on to fear. As we approach the birth of the girls...it's just still so hard for me to imagine it as reality. I've been pregnant, I've given birth, but I've never brought a living baby home. Can this really happen? I believe it can...or at least I want to. I see everyone else doing it...why can't I see myself doing it?

From my devotional today:
Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying,
"This is the way; walk in it."
Isaiah 30:21

When we have doubts or are facing difficulties, when caution dictates one approach but faith another, we should be still. We should calm ourselves in the sacred stillness of God's presence, study His word for guidance, and with true devotion focus our attention on Him. You must get alone with Him, where the lights and the darkness of this world cannot interfere.

"BE STILL" - a deeper step in faith and rest.
"Be still and know" your Father does know best
The way to lead His child to that fair land,
A "summer" land, where quite waters flow;
Where longing souls are satisfied, and "know
Their God," and praise for all that He has planned

From Beth Moore study of David:
Our best recourse when negative emotions begin controlling us is to fall before the throne of grace and seek God. Take solace in the fact that Christ knows how it feels to be tempted by feelings. Ask God to make you aware of the constant reminders of His presence in your life so that you can have His assurance no matter what your circumstances.

I think God is trying to tell me something. Be Still, Seek Him...one simple phrase...four words...let it sink in. I will keep pressing into Him...keep praying...and keep reading His word.

For fun!
Thank You Nana Bayer for the new bedding for the girls! It brightens up the nursery even more and the girls will love it!

Genevieve's new bedding!

Hope's new bedding!

Love to you all! Thank you for your encouraging comments and your prayers.


  1. i really do understand. i've had one successful pg with a beautiful 3 year old girl now! and then 2 m/c...at times i feel it will never happen again for us and even if i get a + on a pg test, that i will panic about the pg.

  2. After you bring those cute girlies home, then you can go back and help other moms. You are a blessing on this earth, Jamie.